May 11

Complacency: Mother’s Day Faux Pas

This post has nothing to do with prepping, well maybe a little bit if you factor insight and perception into the grand scheme of things there is a lesson to be learned.  If you’ve been following my blog for the almost 2 years it has been online I’m sure you have gotten to know me, as such you might find some value and comedy in this post.

As you know today is Mother’s Day, the holiday where we thank our mom’s for giving us life and our wives who are mom’s for being awesome to our children.  A few weeks ago my wife and I were having a conversation about Mother’s Day, she mentioned how it has become a commercialized holiday and stated (at least to my recollection) that: “No worries, you don’t have to get me anything for Mother’s Day.”  I thought to myself, that’s pretty sweet as we have been spending quite a bit on projects around the house, I support her practicality and will definitely go through with that plan of action.

This morning I sat at my computer drinking coffee as my wife came downstairs, I told her happy Mother’s Day and gave her a kiss.  Mission accomplished, nothing further necessary based on our previous standing agreement.  I couldn’t have been more wrong.  As the day wore on I began to see that my wife appeared to be tired or bored, or maybe had something wrong with her.  I inquired a few times to which she replied nothing was wrong, alright then I’ll just carry on doing whatever it is I had planned for the day.

Around 5pm I got a phone call from my daughter and she asked me if I had gotten mom anything for Mother’s Day.  “Why would I do that, she told me I didn’t have to get her anything.”  “Dad, you’d better get her some flowers and a card before the day is over.”  I’ve been married for quite a few years and still don’t get it.  When you tell me X but really mean Y, what’s that all about?  If you want flowers and other trinkets just say so and I’ll make it happen, it really is that simple as I (and most men) think in black and white…straight lines and square boxes.  If you tell me you DON’T want something I’ll take it literally and NOT worry about getting you something.

Anyways I made an emergency run to the store around 6pm, picked my wife up 24 roses and a card.  I brought these gifts home and was greeted with: “It’s about time you thought about me.”  What??  I’ve been thinking about you all day, wished you happy Mother’s Day and everything (I internalized this monologue of course).

Prepping for SHTF is hard, trying to figure out women is many more times harder.  Just when you think you are ready for anything, a woman comes in and knocks you down a few pegs.  Oftentimes as type A personality males our greatest strengths can be our greatest weaknesses.


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  1. J

    am glad it didnt turn into a disaster for you. One thing I have learned in my marriage is the phrase “you don’t have to get me anything” doesn’t mean ” don’t get me anything”. Nothing might be said if you dont, but going that extra step can make someone feel extra appreciated. I don’t proffess to understand it or how the “fairer sex” think , it is just something I have learned through trial and error, mostly error.

  2. Brandon

    Hahaha! Wow, close call, PJ! Good thing your daughter gave you a heads up, or things could have gotten ugly!

    I agree, I would have thought that you didn’t need to get here anything, because she said you didn’t.

    Also, cards… I don’t normally send cards to people, because if you send someone an email saying “Happy birthday!” or “Merry Christmas!”, that’s pretty much the same thing, isn’t it? It shows you haven’t forgotten.


    “it is just something I have learned through trial and error, mostly error.” Hahahaha! :) Well, it’s good that you’ve learned, even if you did have to learn through making lots of mistakes.


    Can we get a woman’s perspective on this?

  3. Echo5Charlie

    Haha, I remember falling for this trap! You got off easy. I don’t understand why they do this, but many of my friends wives do this as well.

  4. Katieo

    It’s not that we want something specific (unless they’ve said in the past I would like… or it would be nice if I had…..) It’s nice when the DH makes an effort and goes out and gets a card / flowers. Sometimes I get a nice surprise when I get something I had been thinking about but knew I wasn’t going to get it for myself (I’m too practical with the budget.) Nothing extravagent but maybe he’ll get a couple of pieces of expensive Godiva chocolate I like or a book I said I’d like to read.. It kinda shows that you DO listen to us once in awhile 😉

    1. PJ

      I listen…sometimes :)

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